College Doesn't Have Mean the End of Young Adult Ministry

August kicks off that time of year that many parents and youth directors dread---the older youth heading off to college, far, far away. As those sweet young adults saunter out of the sanctuary for the last time for at least nine months, fears begin to fill the minds of the youth leaders who are left behind. Gone are the helpful hands to assist with the needs of the younger children. Instead those hands are off to college where they will learn new things and might return home every blue moon. Often youth directors fear the worst, believing that the college students will abandon the ministry and not return to their roots.

While it is an adjustment when your older youth return to school, it doesn’t have to be the end of young adult ministry. Many local youth departments are coming up with creative ways to stay in contact with their older youth at the various colleges across the country.
Stumped on what your youth ministry could do? Here are a few ways to get the brainstorming juices working!

Show appreciation
Let’s face it. Young people can be assets in creating and maintaining a contagious youth ministry. If your participants are interested in the programming and the ministry, they encourage their young friends and family to be the same; which causes the ministry to grow and be fruitful. However, if the fruit is going to flourish and grow, the youth ministry must show the same interest in their lives. As the preparations for college draw near, consider having a “Young Adult Appreciation Sunday,” where members of the congregation can send the college-bound students on their way with hugs, well wishes and a much needed donation to make sure they have much needed essentials to create the perfect “home away from home.”

To show your appreciation for the work they have done over the summer, find out from their parents what their needs are and head to the nearest store. Stores like Bed, Bath & Beyond and Kmart often have a college section that features all of the essentials a college student will need.
Other ways to show the youth department’s gratitude include making a visit to the local Bible bookstore.

Purchasing them a prayer journal and a few helpful books and CDs will keep them focused on what they have learned and encourages good Bible study habits. At www.simplyyouthministry.com, Doug Fields of the popular Saddleback Church offers products that are age specific and tackle real issues of young people. Issues including healthy relationships, maintaining a relationship with God while in college and staying focused while in class are a few examples of the products available.

Don’t Be A Stranger!
Visit your young person at school (by invitation of course) in a variety of ways that reinforce your dedication to their future. Don’t just crowd in their dorm room and ogle at their roommates. For example, if the student is involved in a Christian fellowship on campus, plan a visit around attending their services or special events. And don’t be judgmental or territorial, show your support and participate in the services!

However, if a Christian fellowship is not available, consider setting up a satellite youth ministry on campus. This might mean renting a classroom or linking up with a local church outside of campus. Visiting your youth at college will lend a hand to your outreach efforts and will demonstrate to your young person that you are interested in the activities they are involved in while they are away from home.

Keep in touch!
In the days of social networking, there is no reason not to communicate with your college-bound youth online. Youth can share their latest successes, pictures and the overall comings and goings of college. Sites like MySpace make it easy to set up pages for your youth department to post pictures from “back home” and even set up a virtual Bible Study.

So dry your tears youth leader! My implementing a few creative ideas, it will almost be as if your older youth never left!

Hidden Treasures

I used to think that my Grandma Darlean was the meanest woman that ever lived. All she ever did was fuss at me. “Sherice, clean that up!” “Sit up straight!” I could never do anything right. I just knew that my parents were trying to punish me and were laughing their heads off as they pulled out of the driveway, leaving me at her house every day after school and during the summer.

Grandma Darlean never let me do anything I wanted. Because I was the youngest granddaughter at the time, she would tell me how spoiled I was and that I shouldn’t worry my parents. It was her impression that I should stay silent and out of the way. When she watched me at my parents house and I asked if I could go out and play, she would never let me. I never really felt free with her. I tried to do what she asked and yet when I didn’t, it just made me want to go home more. I thought she was the most infuriating, suffocating woman.

That is, until I discovered the kitchen. My grandmother was the not greatest cook. God rest her soul, she couldn’t even make cornbread, although her baked potatoes and cauliflower were the best tasting ever, which would go down so well with the dishes that my mother sent to hold me over until I got home. Even though she was unable to cook well, Grandma did like watching cooking shows, something that we could agree to watch together. We watched Yan Can Cook and The Urban Peasant on the Public Broadcasting channel every day. We oohed and ahhed over gourmet veggies and chicken, and all sorts of meats that the chefs created. And in that time, we bonded. We really enjoyed watching the finished product.

As an inquisitive child who never really liked to sit, I got the bright idea of turning our tv time into our time together in the kitchen. It started with a salad. She helped me cut the veggies and together we mixed them in with the lettuce and the dressing. All the while, Grandma Darlean was cleaning behind my mess and when I was finally done making one out of the salad, we proudly we ate it with baked potatoes.

So the kitchen became our place. She began to tell me the stories of our history, people that I would never meet became alive again in that kitchen. We talked about her times working in the Chrysler plant while the men were at war and how it felt to have to find another job when they came back. As I learned my history, I experimented with spaghetti, fried chicken, eggs and ice cream sundaes. We also cleaned her jewelry in the kitchen, where as we cleaned she pointed out what she received from working as a maid in rich White and Jewish homes in Detroit. She gave me a clear picture of what it was like to hold her children tight as they laid on the floor during the race riots.

While I didn’t always get along with my grandmother, she taught me how to conduct myself as a lady and how to provide for a family—which was a lot of lessons that I treasure and try to share with the young girls and boys that come to the church. I remember all of the lessons fondly even the ones that I hate the most—cleaning up after myself as I prepared the meal. “You always want to clean up the mess,” Grandma Darlean would tell me. “That way you don’t have a whole lot to clean at the end.”

My childhood is chock full of memories from Grandma Darlean. Her lessons are irreplaceable and have followed me throughout my entire life. She taught me so many things, including how to die with grace. As she neared the end of her life, she felt her mortality coming to an end and she told me things that she wanted to know. She began to write down her history and told me what she wanted everyone to have when she left this life. I told her that I couldn’t do what she wanted and how I didn’t want her to die. “One day, I won’t be here, but I don’t want you to cry,” she told me. “You have to remember to be strong for the ones who are weak and always to conduct yourself as a lady.”

She spoke those words to me 11 years ago and I have treasured them the entire time. And though I didn’t want to admit it at the time, Grandma Darlean was right—about everything. People who come into our lives don’t always act the way we want them to and don’t always say what we want them to say. But if we get past our wants and desires and look into the spirit of that person, the lessons they can teach us appear like the blessings that they truly are.

Miss you Granny.

Share your thoughts by clicking the comments link below or joining us at Young, Married and in Ministry on Facebook.

Your Sister-in-Christ,
Sherice Danielle Snead/Divine Elements

That Fire

My favorite character in the Bible is Timothy. He had a certain fire, a passion that refused to be quenched. Timothy had such a strong calling on his life that oftentimes it threatened to suffocate him. If it hadn’t been for his mentor, Paul, Timothy wouldn’t have been such a powerful force in the city of Ephesus. Because of how his mentor had trained him, Timothy was compelled to tell the truth about the many issues happening in Ephesus. I imagine Timothy standing in the hidden churches, not being ashamed to preach the Gospel. But I also imagine that because Timothy was flesh and blood like you and me, he was self-conscious of what others thought of him and how they treated him. He wanted people to listen to what he was preaching, not because he was saying it, but because they needed to hear it for their own salvation.

Unfortunately, the people of Ephesus did not understand. To them, they only saw a young boy trying to be a preacher. Thinking that he was a typical boy who was a wee bit passionate, they talked amongst themselves about why Paul had sent a child to preach to them. And in their ignorance, they didn’t hear a word that he said and missed out on their blessing and their salvation. Paul, having been in the ministry long enough to know people, knew just what to say to his young mentee. Paul, ever wise and direct to the point, told him in so many words to buck up. “Let no one despise or think less of you because of your youth, but be an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.” (I Timothy 4:12, AMP)

Paul’s words are effective even today to the young leaders—meaning us. The young leaders of today have “that fire” within them, a type of passion that cannot be quenched. But because ignorance continues to fight to prevail, it’s important that young leaders of today not let anyone detract from the path that God has ordained. There are people that go after you because they don’t want you to do it, but right behind them are people who are blessed because of how God works through your actions.

I can’t help but remember my first year. I had so many ideas and was surprised by certain members of the congregation who all but rejected every idea I had come up with. Like Timothy, I had “that fire” and knew that God was leading me on the right path. I was literally bursting at the seams with ideas for programs and how to get the young people involved. But, like Timothy, many rejected my ideas and leadership because of my age. Looking like a fish out of water, I admit that I wanted to give up. I wanted to walk away and be just like everyone else and not do anything because the rejection and rebellion affected me so deeply. I remember telling my husband (boyfriend at the time) that I couldn’t take it anymore and that someone else could take it over. I was done. I drove home that evening feeling conflicted and confused. A part of me felt relieved that I wouldn’t have to carry the load anymore. The other half of me worried about the kids who would suffer from the lack of leadership. Who would carry the ideas out?

I tried to force the situation from my mind and went to sleep. That night I slept terribly. I tossed and turned and cried in my sleep. It was during that night that the Lord had spoke to me and told me that I was not done with the youth ministry. He told me that I had to lean on His understanding and that I was only done when He said so. The next morning I had the opportunity to meet my Brother-in-Christ, Timothy through Bible Study. I was reading chapter 4 like a self-help pamphlet and couldn’t help but crying when I read the passage that seemed so directed at me. “Do not neglect the gift which is in you [that special inward endowment] which was directly imparted to you [by the Holy Spirit] by prophetic utterance when the elders laid their hands upon you.” (I Timothy 4:14, AMP)

Are you struggling within the leadership position that has been bestowed upon you? Are you going through a trying situation in your family or at work and yet feel that you aren't getting the respect that you deserve? I ask the question because while many of the people who read this blog are active in the ministry and their walk with God and while they are doing phenomenal work, truly no one knows the mind of that person except THAT PERSON. The burdens of that person are theirs alone.

If you have ever thought about throwing in the towel and letting someone else handle it all, let me tell you that you are not alone. At one point or another, we have all experienced the trials and tribulations of being God’s messengers. I won’t say that it’s easy, but I will say that it gets easier when you rely on God’s wisdom and understanding. As Donnie McClurkin has song before, we all fall down. But friend let me remind you that you have been given a special gift…just you! Don’t turn and walk away from it. Continue to be an example to believers and non-believers in speech, in conduct, in love and in purity.

Share your thoughts by clicking the comment link below or join us in the Young, Married and Ministry group on Facebook.

God’s Blessings Be Upon You!

Your Sister-in-Christ,

Sherice Danielle Snead/Divine Elements

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Community Love

“Tell me what’s going on,” I said as I reassured her with a hug. “Don’t you know that you can always tell me anything? Why did you leave the house without telling everyone?”

“You don’t know what I go through in this house because if you knew, you wouldn’t get mad at me for leaving, ” *Nicole said with tears in her eyes.

As I approach my fourth year in youth ministry, I have to admit that not much shocks me anymore. There are so many things that are taking place in homes today that I think I am a little numb from it all. I really try to focus on the kids and helping them be strong young men and women. But when young *Nicole (name has been changed to protect the innocent) told me about the things that were happening in her house, the numbness surrounding my spirit thawed and I immediately began to feel pain for her emotionally. Here was a young girl who truly has potential, who aspires to be an entrepreneur, gets good grades and literally fighting not to be suffocated by her surroundings.

I soothed her with my loving words, affirmations and many good sound hugs, but as I got back in my car and went back to my own life, I began to realize that what we are doing is not enough. It's not enough because we as a people are not working together effectively to make a change.

Last night I watched “Reclaiming the Dream,” a program put together by CNN and Essence Magazine. As Soledad O’Brien pointedly asked the panel of scholars and humanitarians what was going wrong in the raising of Black children, all I could hear was excuses. I became angry. It’s not enough to talk about the problems and point the fingers at the teachers, society and television. What are we doing to change these issues?

My anger reached its peak as I reflected on the featured non-profit organizations that were discussed during the special. One of them was about counseling “Baby Daddies” so that they could marry the women they impregnated!! Why do we even need that in our community? Not that I don’t think that the program is needed, but what is going on here? You mean to tell me that someone has to be convinced that marriage is an acceptable option when that father loves the mother and want to continue to have a family with this woman?

My anger cooled when I heard more about a program called Daddy’s Promise. Founded by Ed Gordon (formerly of BET News), the non-profit organization provides young black men with the tools to develop and maintain healthy relationships with their children. This initiative was created because so many children are raised to become adults without the proper tools to show positive affection (minus sex) to one another.

There are children out there who don’t know anything about positive social and familial bonds. All they know is music videos and the negative images that are happening right in front of their faces!

People of God, it’s not enough to talk about the issues. We could watch every program about it on CNN, participate in discussions at our family reunions or shake our heads as we watch a young woman or man walk around in revealing clothing at school, but it’s not enough. I encourage everyone to evalute yourselves and get involved in your community. Provide the necessary tools to your sons and daughters by being an example! And if there are programs that are going on at your local church/recreation center that are designed to help the youth—get involved! Don’t let another day go by without doing something.

And remember, the “Nicole’s” of this world are depending on you.

What are your thoughts?

Your Sister-In-Christ,

Sherice Danielle Snead

The Pregnancy Diaries--Week 16

I made a terrible mistake yesterday. I was cleaning the kitchen on Sunday morning (something I have started doing because it looks hideous throughout the week) and got the munchies. As I slammed the door to the dishwasher with pride, I thought about the Chinese food that we had for dinner the previous night and thought it couldn’t hurt to heat up a little for breakfast. Despite my subconscious mind trying to tell me not to do it, I decided to eat it anyway.

The result was an unhappy baby and an unhappy baby in my case usually ends up with tears from Mommy, and Mommy gripping a toilet for dear life throwing up everything that has ever been consumed. Geez! If only I had listened!! At first I thought it was morning sickness (in the second trimester), but as my stomach continue to gurgle on the ride to church, I knew it was the chicken fried rice that I had ingested. The final straw was my sorry attempt to put some lotion on. The smell alone sent me running to the bathroom. And we are talking full sprint here….twice!
Lesson quite learned. Baby Snead does not like greasy food and simply will not tolerate it in the morning. We’re sticking to the peaches and pecans in the morning.

However, a late night snack is quite another thing…but that’s a whole ‘nother story.

God’s Blessings Be Upon You!
Your Sister-in-Christ,
Sherice Danielle Snead
What are your thoughts?
"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity." I Timothy 4:12

The Pregnancy Diaries...Week 15

Ok, so most of you guys know by now....I’m Pregnant! And it is totally freaking me out! And just if you are wondering how I’m feeling, I’m achy, sleepy, hungry, swollen, nauseous, paranoid and moody, all of which makes me sound like the seven dwarfs from “Snow White.”Ok, so I’m lying. It’s not really that bad all the time. I wake up in the middle of the night wondering what my baby is going to look like and I can’t help it. I get excited thinking about the little miracle that God has given us. And looking at those baby clothes in the store....wow!

I will say that everything changes when you get pregnant. Your perception about life totally changes, which can really be a pain in the patootie to a kindly workaholic like myself. For example, when I go to pick something up or stoop over to do a task, I wonder, “Am supposed to do this?” Every pain means something and I have to check it out in one of my many pregnancy books before I can go on with my day. The way that I approach the youth department, cleaning the house, grocery shopping, even travelling is different. I wonder if the baby will be ok if I get on a plane or if I am going to have contractions.

These qualms are exactly why I feared going on vacation for the Fourth of July weekend. What if something happened and my insurance didn’t work? What if my ankles swelled so that I couldn’t walk? What if? It was driving me insane, especially since Jason couldn’t come with me because he had to work. My great protector would be at home and suddenly without me even noticing, those seven dwarfs of pregnancy surrounded me and I didn’t know what else to do!

Now, turn the page. Obviously I’m no quitter and couldn’t let this whole travelling thing get the best of me. I kissed my dear husband goodbye and tackled Air Tran Flight 144 to Atlanta with great strength and endurance. Ok, maybe not strength because I gripped my armrest every time I felt a bit of turbulence, but I got through it all the same.

And most importantly, nothing bad happened! I had an awesome vacation where I got to rest the ENTIRE time, shop for maternity clothes, and eat what I wanted! While I was gone, our church and youth department didn’t implode and my leaders took care of business without any issue. Even more awesome!

Needless to say, my life further served as a testament to good ole Mathew 6. You remember.. “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
Now that I am rested, the workaholic wants to come out and play again. Well at least until the seven dwarfs of pregnancy decide they want to play as well.

God’s Blessings Be Upon You!

Your Sister-in-Christ,

Sherice Danielle Snead

What are your thoughts?

"Don't let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in life, in love, in faith and in purity." I Timothy 4:12

Leaving A Ministry

It was the worst thing that could happen to a Christian. And yet, it happened during the best time of my life. In January of 2004, I accepted Christ as my true Lord and Savior at Central Michigan University. I remember that moment all too well. I had been seeking more from God and had undergone what I affectionately termed as “Holy Spirit Boot Camp.” And after I came down from the spiritual high from receiving the gif t of the Holy Spirit, a sinking feeling struck me. God became to speak to me and told me that in order to follow the plan that He set for me, I would have to leave the church that had been my spiritual home since the day I was born.

Leaving a church is difficult. As hard as it is to move on, it is important to take the appropriate steps to assure the least amount of pain and ease the transition.

1. Pray about it
Leaving a church is a serious thing. Consult God on the choice you have and be prepared for the answers you receive.

2. Discover whether change is necessary.
Just because there’s a church on the other side of the town that offers every type of ministry ever created doesn’t mean that you have to join

3. Express yourself
If you are involved in leadership and are fighting with leaving for a specific reason, schedule a meeting with your Pastor. You may find that a conversation with your Pastor will provide clarity and could keep you within your current ministry.

4. If you decide to go...
Write a heartfelt and detailed letter to your Pastor and your church board indicating your decision to leave the ministry. Consult God before composing this letter and keep a copy for your records.

My decision to leave the church I grew up in was a very difficult decision to make. However, the Lord was leading me to a place where I could grow spiritually. I left my friends and those who trained me in the art of true community service. But what I chose to do is take all of the positive aspects and let them lead me into a positive future.

My prayers are with you!